Working from home definitely has it's perks, just like it has its downfalls. But seriously, being able to wake up at whatever time you like and work in your pj's, is more awesome than not. It makes me think back to all of those years that I would have to get up at the crack of dawn (4:00 am) to get the kids off to the babysitter and then myself to work. I worked 12-14 hour days for many years. Then I found office work, where I still somehow worked 12 hour days, but at least I didn't go in until later. All those years, I rarely saw my children, except to get the dressed and drop them off or to say a quick goodbye. On most evenings I would get home after 6 and we had such a small window of time to catch up and be a family before we had to go to bed and get ready to do it all over again the next day.
I think this has a lot to do with why I let my girls get away with so much and I am always quick to try to buy them something they want. It's all those years and years of guilt, I feel no matter how hard I try to make up for it, I never will. A mom is supposed to be there for their kids, she is supposed to be the first person they see when they wake up. She is supposed to drop them at school and pick them up. A mom is supposed to be around when you need her. For many years I wasn't around during those precious moments. When my little girls were so little, they were getting themselves ready and off to school with only the help of the two oldest. Vane and Jack took the brunt of having to help raise two little girls, because their mom was at work, and their father had decided he needed to move on.
Sorry, the point of my post is supposed to be about being thankful and being happy. I'm just very melodramatic these days. But to get back to the point, I am super thankful that even though my girls are no longer little, I now can spend that time we were denied for so long. Take today for example: I saw Sammy when she was leaving for school, and now China and Cici are up in their room watching some sort of horror movie and cracking up. While I sit here and work, I know they are close by after both having been gone for over a year. That's why I am not upset they decided to move back home, like someone else might be. I am happy I can help my children in their time of need, my home will always be open to them.
Life is such a roller coaster. It's really taken us for a ride in the last seven years. But I am a big believer in things happening as they are supposed to. Already we are such different people from the snobby family that only used to shop in department stores and would never go in a thrift store. Heck, we just outfitted the whole downstairs in thrift store chic. We've learned what it is to struggle and we have learned that as long as we are together it doesn't matter if we are driving in a Volvo or riding the bus. Today I am thankful for having my girls near me and being able to see them when they are home. I am thankful that we are going out this evening on our ritual walk to Starbucks and Chinese food. I am thankful that even though a piece of our family is not with us at the moment (another story), that we will hopefully get the chance to get them home soon.
When life seems the darkest, is when we really have to look around and see just how much greatness is in our lives. Today I chose not to look at the darkness, I instead choose to face the light and enjoy all the little things...
(this was the amazing sunset we saw the other night during our walk)